iTreeHouse
by Uchiha Ryuga
Summary: A response to the challenge by Smartbabie. When Sam and Freddie are trapped in a treehouse for an afternoon due to a maniacal plot of Spencer's doing, what events will unfold? My first attempt at a story that isn't a crossover, so please R&R. Now Complete
1. Spencer's maniacal plot of maniacalness

What up all? So, like the summary said, this is my first normal story, so please, tell me what you think.

Disclaimer: I do not own iCarly, nor the phrases 'Super Special Awesome' or 'Dood.' They belong to Dan, LittleKuriboh, and Nippon Ichi

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It was a normal cheerful Saturday in the Bushwell apartment complex, the sun was shining and the birds were chirping. Yep, an absolutely peaceful da…

"Get back here Benson!" Sam roared, chasing Freddie around the Shay's living room. Never mind, the sun decided to hide behind the moon and the birds flew off in fear.

"Get away from me, Sam!" Freddie yelled back, running for his life.

"Not until you pay for eating the last piece of ham!!" Sam screamed, tackling Freddie down and pinning him to the ground before punching at his face.

"Sam, stop it!" Freddie yelled from behind his arms, both of which he was using as a shield to protect his face from Sam's vicious punches.

" No way Benson, you deserve--- Carly!!!" Sam yelled, relenting punching Freddie in order to shield her own face as Carly began squirting her with the squirt bottle of doom.

"Sam, stop punching Freddie, Freddie, don't eat Sam's ham." Carly scolded as her two friends stood up.

"Fine…" the two of them sighed simultaneously before looking at each other, scoffing, and looking away.

"You guys…" Carly meekly began, but was cut off by Spencer opening the front door and bounding into the room.

"You guys!" the sculptor yelled excitedly as he bent over slightly, panting heavily. "You'll never guess what I found!"

"One of Fredweird's relatives that _isn't_ a total psychopath?" Sam asked, shooting Freddie a loathing look.

"Or maybe one of Sam's relatives who _isn't _on parole or in jail?" Freddie asked, shooting Sam an equally loathing look.

"Umm, no…" Spencer said, looking slightly confused. "But I _did_ find the most Super Special Awesome thing ever!"

"What'd you find?" Carly asked, smiling at her elder brother's shenanigans.

"I'm not gonna tell you!" Spencer said in a childish, high-pitched squeal. "You're gonna have to come with me if you want to see it!"

"Oh, okay." Carly said, smiling and shaking her head before heading out the door.

"Whatev." Sam said before shrugging and vanishing out the door behind her best friend.

"I guess." Freddie sighed as he followed his blonde-haired tormentor out if the room.

'_Yesss…_' Spencer thought manically. '_Soon, revenge shall be mine!_'

"Spencer, hurry up!" Carly called into the apartment.

"Coming!" Spencer yelled as he closed and locked the door behind him.

* * *

"So, Spence, where we goin'?" Sam asked from the back seat as Spencer pulled out of the parking lot. "And what's the ladder for?" She gestured up towards the ladder on the roof of the car as she said this.

"It's a secret." Spencer said, lifting his right index finger up to his mouth in a 'shushing' motion.

"Will you at least tell us how long it's gonna take?" Freddie questioned, also from the back.

"Oh, only about five more minutes." Spencer replied as he took a right, heading towards the woods.

"So, when'd you find this thing you wanted to show us?" Carly asked from next to Spencer.

"Oh, you see, this morning me and Socko were out exploring when we found this amazing thing I just _had _to show you guys!" Spencer enthusiastically replied, hopping up and down slightly.

"How come we've never even met Socko?" Freddie questioned, truly curious.

"Oh," Spencer answered as he pulled his car into a dirt parking lot in the woods, "that's cuz Socko's very shy. Anyway, we're here!"

"Finally!" Sam complained as the four of them exited the vehicle.

"Okay!" Spencer yelled as he removed the ladder from the top of the car. "Who's ready to go see _it_?!"

"We don't even know what '_it_' is!" Carly exclaimed as she, Sam, and Freddie followed her crazy brother.

"All in due time, Carly, all in due time." Spencer cryptically told her, earning him an annoyed huff.

"Just give us a straight answer, man!" Sam groaned as they followed Spencer deeper into the woods.

"No need to be so mean." Spencer said slightly sadly as he stopped near a thick, knotted old tree. "Besides we're here." He gestured up and the three teens saw a large treehouse located about twenty feet in the air.

"Seriously Spencer?" Carly asked, amused and annoyed that they had been brought out into the middle of nowhere just for a treehouse.

"Yeah!" the elder Shay replied as he set the ladder up so it was aligned with the trapdoor on the bottom of the treehouse. "Go on up!" The three reluctantly went up, Carly first, followed by Sam, and lastly Freddie. "So, what do you guys think?"

"Dood, this place is awesome!" Sam called out, looking around the treehouse.

"Oh, darn it!" Spencer complained from the ground.

"What is it, Spencer?" Freddie asked, looking out of the window and down at his elder brother figure.

"I forgot something in the car, Carly, will you come down and help me get it?" Spencer called back up the ladder.

"Sure!" Carly answered as she carefully climbed down the ladder and looked up at her elder brother. "What'd you forget?"

"Oh, you know." Spencer replied, looking slightly excited. "The ladder."

"What do you-?" Carly began, but was immediately answered when Spencer picked up the ladder and took off running.

"Spencer!" Carly, Sam, and Freddie frantically called after him though Sam and Freddie were much more frantic than Carly was.

"This is my revenge for all of those evil and mean 'Wake up Spencer' segments!" Spencer yelled as he kept running.

"Oh, man." Carly exasperatedly said before looking up at her two best friends, who were looking out of the window, horrorstruck. "I'll go get him, in the mean time _please_ try not to kill each other! Spencer, come back here!" On that note, she took off running after her childish brother.

"Oh, this is just perfect." Sam complained as she slumped against the wall next to the window and slid down it. "I've _totally_ been looking forward to spending my Saturday stuck in a treehouse with a dork."

"Oh please, like I've got it any better." Freddie grumbled as he sat cross-legged in the middle of the treehouse, facing Sam. "Spending my Saturday with a blonde-headed demon who constantly harasses me doesn't sound all that appealing either."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, Frednub." Sam said, waving her hand at him. "All I know is, as soon as he gets back, Spencer is gettin' the _biggest_ Texas Wedgie ever."

Freddie chuckled. "Hey, as long as it's not me, I'm not complaining."

"Stop talking or you _will_ be getting one."

"Yes ma'am."

"Good boy."

Freddie sighed. This was going to be a _loooong _day.

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Now that they have no way out, how will Sam and Freddie cope? Review, and the next chapter will come out faster. C'mon, you know you want to.


	2. Hour One

Hey guys, sorry I haven't updated lately, but I've been busy. Well, please enjoy the next chapter of the Smartbabie challenge, iTreehouse.

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"Ugh!" Sam complained as she paced in circles around the treehouse, muttering choice words about Spencer under her breath. "It's _sooo_ boring being stuck up here with a nub." Freddie rolled his eyes at the comment. "How long have we been up here, anyways?"

Freddie pulled out his phone and checked the time. "Seven minutes, Sam."

"Kill me now." Sam exasperatedly sighed before sitting down and leaning against the part of the tree jutting through the middle of the aerial wood box.

"Look on the bright side." Freddie said trying to stay positive. "It could be cold and raining." Then, as if some Higher Power specifically had it in for Freddie, the sky opened up and it began pouring rain.

"You just _had_ to say something, didn't you Fredward?" Sam complained as she shivered slightly. She rubbed her bare arms in an attempt to keep warm. "Man, I knew I was gonna regret not wearing a hoodie today."

Freddie sighed before removing the long-sleeved shirt he was wearing, leaving him in the white undershirt he was wearing underneath. "Here." He offered her the shirt, which she disdainfully looked at before looking him square in the eye. "What?"

"Why?" Sam questioned, uncertainty in her eyes.

"What do you mean 'why?'" Freddie questioned back, shivering slightly, and wondering why Sam didn't snatch the shirt away to make herself more comfortable and make him less comfortable.

"I mean, why would you _willingly_ give me your shirt?" Sam asked, looking at him intently. "Not that I wasn't going to make you give it to me anyways, but still." She grinned at him, and he smiled back at her.

"What, aren't I allowed to be nice?" he joked, causing her to laugh slightly.

"Pfft, since when are we nice to each other?" she joked back, this time causing him to let out a deep chuckle that sent a different kind of shiver up her spine.

"Touché." Freddie responded before actually handing her the shirt, which she happily accepted and slipped on, inhaling the scent that smelled curiously like a mixture of laundry detergent, lemon, and Randy Jackson cologne. "Uhh, Sam, why are you smelling my shirt?" Freddie asked, slightly disturbed, but very amused.

"I-I'm not!" Sam uncharacteristically sputtered, her face turning ever so slightly pink, before grabbing a pinecone from the floor and chucking at him, hitting him directly between the eyes.

"Oww!" Freddie exclaimed, gingerly rubbing the now red area and glaring at Sam. "The Hell, Sam?!" Sam laughed slightly at his outburst.

"Awww, widdle Fweddikins is using big boy wowds now." Sam jokingly cooed to him, causing him to growl in frustration and roll his eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, yuck it up." Freddie complained as he shivered slightly before he closed his eyes, leaned against the wall opposite Sam, and slid down. "So, how long do you think the rains gonna last?" Five seconds went by and Freddie didn't receive an answer. "Sam?" he asked, opening one eye slightly. His vision was obscured by blonde curls as Sam sat down in between his open legs and leaned closer to him, resting her back against his chest. Freddie's face instantly reddened due to the close proximity with the violent blonde. "Uhh, Sam?"

"What, Fredward?" Sam asked, violently whipping her head around to look at him and accidently smacking him in the face with her hair. "Oops, sorry."

"Right." Freddie said, blinking away the tears from when her hair hit him in the eye. "So, umm, why are you so close?"

"I-I was still cold." Sam stuttered out, her face going a small tinge of pink. "And you're warm for a nub, so stop complaining and be grateful I gave you the opportunity to be as close to a girl as you're ever gonna get."

"Oh, gee, thanks." Freddie said to her, rolling his eyes. "Though, it's not like you're much of a girl to begin with." This earned him a hard elbow in the ribs. "Oof!"

"You say somethin', Freddork?" Sam 'innocently' asked the now wheezing boy behind her.

"No, nothing at all." Freddie panted out as he massaged his sore ribs.

"Good Nubby." Sam joked as she uncomfortably contorted her arm to pet Freddie on the head.

"Haha." Freddie sarcastically laughed before he rested his forehead on her right shoulder, inhaling her scent, noting she smelled of BBQ sauce, Fat Cakes, and Ham.

"Now why are you smelling _me_, Fredward?" Sam jokingly asked, countering his action with his previous question.

"Well," he replied, moving his mouth next to her ear, tickling it with his breath and causing her to involuntarily shudder for the second time within a few minutes, "if what you said is true and I'll never get this close to a girl again, I may as well enjoy every…" He lifted his hands from his sides. "Last." He wrapped his arms around her sender waist and pulled her in as close as possible, causing her to let out a nearly inaudible gasp. "Second." He then did something she didn't expect and lightly nipped at her earlobe, causing her to let out a small sound that sounded like a mixture of a gasp and a whimper.

"Fredward?" she questioned at his action, earning her nothing more than a light suck on the lobe, causing her moan slightly. Reacting to the moan, he swept his tongue down her neck. Instead of causing her to moan again, like he wanted, she whimpered and gripped his knees. "What are you…? Ohhh." She let out a loud moan when he moved his head forward slightly and bit the pulse of her neck hard, but not hard enough to draw blood. '_Mmmm, if he keeps this up I may just..._'

"'What am I' what, Sam?" Freddie lightly growled as he slipped both his thumbs slightly up her shirt and rubbed the soft skin at her sides. When he got no response, he was slightly confused. "Sam?" He leaned forward again and noticed she had fallen asleep. He chuckled softly and rolled his eyes before he moved her into a more comfortable position against his chest. "Trust her to ruin the mood by falling asleep." he whispered to nobody in particular before getting comfy against the wall and also succumbing to the Sandman, falling asleep to Sam's soft snores and the gentle pitter-patter of the rain.

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Was that little bit of Seddie goodness enough to make up for not updating lately? I sure hope so. Well, till next time, girls and guys. And remember, stay in school, eat your veggies, and R&R.


	3. Hour Two

Hey, what's up all? You all ready to read some Seddie goodness? Well, I sure hope so, otherwise you're reading the wrong story. Please enjoy.

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Sam woke up a few scant minutes over an hour later, finding herself still encased in Freddie's warm embrace. She craned her neck slightly to get a better look at his peacefully sleeping face. '_Hmph, stupid sleeping Nub and his stupid soft hair and strong arms and sexy voice… No! Snap out of it, Puckett, this is _Fredward Benson_, King of the Geeks you're talking about here_!' she thought to herself, completely unaware that she was unconsciously shaking her head from side to side, causing her golden locks to lightly sweep across Freddie's face. Freddie chuckled lightly, interrupting Sam from her musings and startling her slightly.

"A little jumpy, are we, Puckett?" he whispered, his breath tickling her ear, making her shudder yet again.

"Pssh, you must be imagining things, Nub." Sam defensively lied, turning her head back to look him in the eyes, and finding him staring at her with a soft look on his face. "What?" He merely smirked before slipping his thumbs up the sides of her shirt and rubbing the soft skin there again. "W-W-What are you doing?!" Her face instantly flushed from the tender contact.

"Hmm, I wonder." Freddie murmured before leaning down and pressing gentle kisses against her neck.

"F-Fredward you better stop." Sam unconvincingly stuttered out before letting out a tiny moan.

"Now, why would I do that?" Freddie breathed against her neck before playfully nipping his way towards her jaw, causing her to let out another moan. "You seem to be enjoying it."

"Shut up!" she growled, forcing herself away from Freddie and turning around so she could straddle his waist. She then grabbed both of his wrists and pinned them above his head against the wooden wall of the treehouse. She smirked in victory at him. "Humph, looks like I'm in charge now, Fredward."

He smirked back at her. "If you say so, Sam." He then startled her by bucking his hips against hers, earning him another moan from the violent blonde. She glared down at him, a fierce fire evident in her eyes. He raised an eyebrow quizzically before she forcefully crushed her mouth against his in a passionate, dominating kiss.

He couldn't help the low, feral groan that he let out when she forced his lips open and plundered his mouth with her tongue. She smirked against his lips and moved his hands so that she was gripping both wrists with one hand and moved her free hand down and tangled it in his hair before yanking on it, causing him to gasp sharply into the kiss. She pulled back, totally flustered and breathing raggedly, but neither of those things could deter Freddie from noticing the triumphant grin on her face. "Oh, I say so alright." Sam growled at him. He opened his mouth to retort, but all that came out was a strangled moan because Sam leaned forward and roughly bit his throat. She smirked again at the oddly enjoyable sound he had emitted before mimicking his actions from before their nap and sweeping her tongue down the front of his neck.

"Sam!" he gasped when she bit down on hard his collar bone, drawing blood. He wrenched his hands from her grip, grabbed both of her thighs just below her ass and stood up while managing to support her weight, much to Sam's surprise. He then turned around and pinned her against the wall before capturing her lips again, ignoring the taste of his own blood.

She whimpered lightly when he pinned her up to the wall, but not from the contact between her and the wall, but from when he accidently thrust the heat from within his pants into the familiar warmth that had settled within her own pants. She could feel him smirk against her lips and it drove her wild knowing that her dominance had been stolen almost as quickly as it was obtained. She didn't know whether she should be pissed off or even more turned on. She lowered her hands and fumbled with the hem of his under shirt before slipping both of her hands up it and tracing her fingers along his warm stomach and somewhat muscled chest, leaving trails of fire in their wake. '_When did he get muscles?_' she wondered, but her thoughts were interrupted when he moved his right hand from her thigh and slipped it fully up her shirt, running the calloused palm and digits across her smooth stomach, causing her to let out the loudest moan yet into the kiss.

He used this to his advantage and slipped his tongue into her mouth, running it over hers, eliciting another moan from the subdued girl. After a long three seconds of her not doing anything, she finally responded to his probing tongue, pressing hers against his before slowly and agonizingly swirling the tip of his with hers. In an effort to one-up her, he removed his hand from under her shirt, much to her initial dismay, and moved it back down to her to her thigh, but instead of putting it there again to support her weight, he instead spanked her ass, causing her to let out a loud, pleasurably pained moan. He smirked at her reaction, but his face instantly fell when she pulled away from him, staring intently at him, her gaze seeming to penetrate his very soul. "Sorry." he mumbled, looking away dejectedly.

"Again." she whispered so softly that he almost missed it.

"What?" he asked, looking at her, a totally shocked expression on his face. She gave him a shy look that clearly said 'don't make me say it again.' He smiled at her before complying with her wishes and spanking her again, only harder this time.

"Oh, God, Freddie!" Sam loudly moaned, clenching her hands on his chest, accidently digging her nails into his skin.

"Unnh, Sam." he groaned at the feeling of her nails drawing even more of his blood. He then leaned forward and gave her a quick, gentle kiss before saying four words that instantly brought tears to her eyes. "I love you, Sam."

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So, what that bit of love good for everyone? I hope so, because, sadly, the next chapter will be the last. T.T Please R&R


	4. A New Plan

Hey everyone! As much as it saddens me to admit it, this is the final chapter of iTreeHouse, so please read and review! Oh, and be warned, as there is some suggestive language later on. Enjoy!

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"Sam?" Freddie asked, concerned as to why the brazen blonde had suddenly broken into tears. He received no vocalized response, only a passionate, loving kiss pressed against his lips that seemed to last for an eternity. When she finally pulled away, she didn't look at him, opting to instead rest her head next to his and mumbling something into the crook of his neck. "What?"

"I said I love you, too." she muttered only slightly louder so that he could hear her. He smiled lightly before lowering her back to the ground, pulling his head back slightly, and resting his forehead against hers. She smiled back at him as he lifted his hands to cup her face, using his thumbs to brush away the few tears that hadn't fallen yet. They both slowly leaned in for another kiss, but just as they were about to make contact, Sam's phone loudly rang, startling them both. Sam pulled out her phone and looked at, wondering who it was. "Way to ruin the moment, Carly." Freddie chuckled and she smiled at him before accepting the call and answering in a breathless voice. "Hello? Okay. No, I didn't kill the little nub. Okay, see you in a few." Sam clicked the end button before looking at Freddie again. "Carly managed to convince Spencer to get us down. She'll be here in a few."

"All right." Freddie said before leaning down and lightly nipping at her neck again, causing her to sigh contentedly. He pulled away and looked her in the eye. "But what are we gonna tell her?"

Sam smirked before licking her lips, which caused Freddie to shudder slightly in anticipation. "Oh, you leave that to me, Fredward."

"Whatever you say, Sam." Freddie responded before kissing her again.

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"Now, Spencer, what are you gonna tell Sam and Freddie when we let them down?" Carly asked Spencer in an authoritative tone as they neared the treehouse.

"That I'm sorry for being such a big jerk and that I'll buy Sam a ten-pound ham if she promises not to hurt me for leaving her in a treehouse with Freddie for two hours." Spencer muttered in defeat as they walked in front of the tree housing the treehouse and noticed as dirty, red, wet blob on the ground. Carly walked over and picked it up, noticing it was Freddie's shirt.

"Huh." Carly mused to herself before walking back over to Spencer and offering him the article in question, not noticing he was looking up at the treehouse in shock. "Why do you think Freddie's shirt is on the ground?" When she received no answer, she looked up from the shirt to Spencer. "Spencer?" She followed his gaze and her eyes widened when she noticed what he was staring at. Sam's bra was hanging over the edge of the window. "Oh my God."

"Please tell me they're not-" Spencer began, his face paling, but was cut off by a loud moan.

"Oh, God, Freddie!" they heard Sam exclaim quite loudly. "Faster!"

"I can't Sam!" Freddie yelled. "You're too tight!" Poor Carly looked like she was about to throw up and Spencer just looked at the treehouse in horror.

"It's not my fault you're so big!" Carly started gagging and clamped her hands over her ears, hoping it was all a dream and she would wake up soon.

"God, Sam!" Freddie panted. "I'm gonna come!" Spencer's already pale face turned even more white.

"Me too!" Sam moaned. "Come inside me, Freddie!" This brought Spencer back to his senses.

"FREDDIE!" Spencer shouted as loud as he could, startling Carly. "DON'T DO IT!" Then, as if on cue, an acorn and a pinecone came flying out of the window, the acorn hitting Spencer in the eye and the pinecone hitting him in the forehead. "OWW!!! The squirrels are attacking!!" Spencer dropped the ladder and ran behind a tree across from the treehouse, only to come face-to-face with squirrels that appeared to be glaring up at him. "AAAHH!!" Spencer ran back to where he originaly was and heard something from the treehouse: the unmistakable sound of hysterical laughter. Seconds later, both Sam and Freddie's faces appeared in the window, both of them laughing so hard they were actually crying.

"I can't believe you guys fell for that!" Freddie exclaimed between deep laughs.

"Silly Fredward, of course they would!" Sam playfully scolded, mussing up his hair with one hand and grabbing her bra with the other. "It _was_ my idea after all. Now, are you two gonna let us down, or you just gonna stare at us like turkeys in a rainstorm?"

"That depends." Spencer started nervously. "If I buy you a ten-pound ham will you promise not to hurt me?"

"Deal!" Sam said excitedly, all too eager to receive her favorite meat product. "Now get us down!" Spencer complied, setting up the ladder so that they could climb out. Sam went down first, closely followed by Freddie. "Hey, Carls, you okay?" Sam noticed her friend looked sick.

"Y-Yeah." Carly shakily replied, her face slowly regaining its color. "But I can't believe you two! How could you make us think you two were having s-! Se-!"

"Sex?" Sam bluntly asked, finishing Carly's word for her.

"YES!" Carly yelled, her face turning bright red from how embarrassed she was.

"Carly, Carly, Carly." Sam jokingly sighed, shaking her head with each repetition of Carly's name for emphasis. "I may love the boy, but I'm not easy."

"Yeah, I guess you're-" Carly started, but abruptly stopped. "Sam, what did you just say?"

"That I'm not easy?" Sam asked back, phase two of her plan falling into place.

"Before that." Carly said, still using the same tone.

"Boy?" Sam asked, not even bothering to attempt to hide the grin spreading across her face.

"Sam!" Carly agitatedly exclaimed.

"Alright, alright." Sam laughed out. "I said I love Freddie, so what?"

"What do you mean 'so what?'!" Carly practically yelled. "He's right there!"

"I know where he is." Sam said, her grin widening.

"Freddie!" Carly said, turning to the boy in question. "Aren't you going to say anything?!"

"Nope." Freddie replied, smirking. Carly was about to yell at him for not speaking, but she couldn't find her voice when Freddie leaned down and kissed Sam. He pulled away, pulled Sam into a hug, and looked at Carly. "That a good enough answer?" Carly only nodded.

"What just happened?" Spencer asked, making himself noticed for the first time in several minutes. "You know what, I don't even wanna know, let's just go." He smiled to himself as they turned and walked towards the cars, Sam and Freddie holding hands while Carly cooed about how cute they were. 'All is right with the world. I didn't get hurt, Sam and Freddie are happy, and I got my revenge. Wait, my revenge wasn't supposed to make them happy! I'll just have to think up a new plan, this one involving lots of Swedish loofahs! Muwahahaha!!!'

"Spencer?" Carly questioned as they neared the car.

"Yeah, little sis?"

"You were thinking out loud again."

"Crap."

**END**

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And that's all he wrote. I do hope you enjoyed. And keep a lookout as I may be doing a Seddie story that's nothing but oneshots based off random words, so please feel free to give me some extra inspiration!


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